What A Pothole and Two Flat Tires will Teach You

I have had tires that have been leaking, that have had nails stuck in them, and that have had tar stuck on them. It has been since college though since I actually had a flat tire. This time though, I did not receive one flat tire but God decided to bless me with TWO flat tires (both on the right side of the vehicle).

It was late this past Monday Night as Kim and I were returning home from Pennsylvania and we were literally, three minutes and thirty seconds according to the GPS, away from home. Kim and I decided to take a back route to save time. Unfortunately, the road had suffered considerable damage and corrosion from snow ploughs and a hard winter. As we went down a hill there was a large pothole at the bottom ready to greet us. By the time we saw the large pothole (it took up half of our side of the road), it was too late. Both of our tires went into the pothole and instantly burst.

Here are some life and leadership lessons from this incident:
1. I was thankful for my Grandma's generosity. Every year she buys and renews a AAA membership for me. In less than an hour a tow truck came and towed our car back home (free of charge to us).
2. People do care and want to help out. As our car was sitting in someone's driveway a student that attends our youth program and was driving home from work stopped to check in on us. He was surprised to find out that it was his youth pastor that needed help! He allowed my wife to stay in his truck and stay warm while the tow truck came, hooked up our vehicle, and was ready to haul us home. God used that young man to be a refresher and an encouragement to us!
3. Watch the signs and markers around you. Before we hit our monster pothole there was a guy that had gotten a flat tire a few minutes earlier and who was putting his spare tire on in an empty church parking lot. We should have taken this as a warning that the road was in bad shape in more than one spot.
4. When life gives you lemons make lemonade! Instead of yelling and screaming we quickly assessed the damage, made the proper phone calls, and walked to document and take some pictures around the pothole. This helped relieve some anxiety and added some much needed fun to a stressful time.
5. Thankful that we have two cars! (I have respect for families who make it work with just one vehicle).
6. Without ministry friends and neighbors I'd be in trouble! Not only did God provide a student to encourage me while alongside of the road but a young man who is doing Fight Club (a Men's Discipleship Ministry in our church) and who is in my squad and who lives a couple of doors away from me was able to take my tires and rims off for me as he had the right equipment!
7. Take the hardships as a test from God! As much as I wanted to make excuses, complain, or accuse my wife I did my best to hold my tongue. Maybe God allowed this to happen to test me. If we take good from the Lord we must also allow him to use the bad to refine us!

 

In commemoration of two tires that willing gave their lives for Kim and I!

My FIRST close relationship with a STUDENT as a YOUTH LEADER!

Achieving firsts are always a big deal!

A young child's first steps, first night away from home, first day of school, first date, first kiss, the purchase of your first home......you get the point! The first experience or accomplishment is ALWAYS memorable and important.

I can remember the first student that I ever connected with and impacted as a leader.

I was a freshman at Lancaster Bible College and I knew that God was calling me into full-time ministry. I was given some opportunities to speak to the Jr. High Sunday School class at a nearby church.

If you want to test your "ministry mettle" what better place to start with than with Jr. Highers!?! Jr. Highers are impressionable, malleable, full of high energy, forgiving, and bluntly honest.

During my teaching times I noticed one young student taking notes and paying extra attention. I would always briefly interject one deep theological term each teaching session so that he could write it down and dialogue about it with his father.

The young man's curiosity about the Scriptures led to questions, which led to extended conversations, which led to pick-up basketball games, and which led finally to a close relationship. Eventually, I needed a place to stay for the summer as I interned at the church. I was given the opportunity to live with his family for a summer and then live with them for nine months after my college graduation.

I'm happy to say that the young Jr. Higher is now married (to another former Jr. Higher student of mine), is leading worship and working with teenagers in the same youth group, and most importantly is walking with the LORD!

Ministry connects and brings people together! I never would have thought that as a college student a few teaching opportunities to the Jr. Highers would lead to a deep friendship with a student and his family!

Proud of you Allan Dunk! Happy to call you friend and brother in Jesus!

 

Grateful to this family that "adopted" me while in college! It was great reconnecting this week.

An Older BROTHER Perspective - HAPPY BIRTHDAY MARIANNE

"You can choose your friends, but you can't choose your family." Luckily for me, God knows what is best because He specifically placed me into an incredible family!

As a three year old my world was rocked when my parents brought home a baby sister. Within the next few years my mind was boggled that this other sibling was created differently than me. I could not understand why my sister had different body parts, acted differently, and was more emotionally wired.

As time moved on and other young brothers came along it was easy to try and mold and treat my sister like another brother. People generally try to change others to fit a mold within their perspective  that is like them.

As I look back now I'm glad that God blessed me with a younger sister that is different than me. Her skills and giftedness have been a blessing to me. Marianne has helped me to shop for clothes, discuss relationship problems, and has always been around as a support system throughout the years.

She has endured endless pranks, countless sporting events, and manly body odors and jokes. She is a gifted connector of people and knows how to have some fun! She is an inspiration as she works hard to eat healthy and runs frequently!

I don't even think of March 17th as Saint Patrick's Day because it has a greater meaning within my life. March 17th is more importantly my sister Marianne's birthday!

Happy Birthday Marianne! I LOVE YOU and am so glad God put you in my life.

Proverbs 7:4 - Say to wisdom, “You are my sister,” and to insight, “You are my relative.” The point here is of proximity. It's important to be close to wisdom as well as your sister!

Happy Birthday Marianne! As you can tell from this picture us Cosentino men need you!

ONCE A STUDENT OF MINE......ALWAYS DEAR TO MY HEART!

I take relationships seriously.

 

I do not believe occurences and connections happen by chance. God is the Designer of all, including placing people into our lives! 

 

As a youth pastor student relationships are completely fluid. Students are growing up, involved with extra-curricular activities, and are busy just being typical teenagers.

 

Therefore, it is important that I am intentional about doing my best to foster and cultivate healthy relationships with students. That is why I constantly check social media, visit students during lunch and after school, and try to plan events and meetings times to connect. Let's face it: if the God of the Universe placed you in my path it's for a specific reason.

 

As a youth pastor I have the opportunity to walk with young people through some pretty pivotal and incredible times in their life. From break-ups, to graduations, to mission trips, to pranks, to eventual marriages I get a front row seat beside teens and their parents. (I do not take this fact lightly as I'm probably in numerous 'family' photos).

 

Through the journey some strong connections and relationships get built. I have come up with this saying and I truly mean it: "Once a student of mine, always dear to my heart!" I've had the opportunity to lead various youth programs, trips, and events. I believe God specifically placed me in the path of certain young people....and I am glad He did!

 

One of the biggest joys in ministry is being able to know that God placed you in a certain spot because he had a specific person or group of persons that he wanted you to influence.

 

3 John 4 "I have no greater joy than to see that my children are walking in the truth." Nothing brings me greater joy than watching young people get it and walk with Jesus!

 

I'm glad God placed YOU in my life for a specific reason!

 

My wife and I had the opportunity to eat lunch this past Sunday with some former students of mine!

 I LOVE and am PROUD of the people in this photo!

The Wisdom of Teams

Working on a high-performance team is challenging, yet is exhilarating and fun. If you want to get something done do it yourself, if you want go farther join a productive team.

 

For example...............

 

My sophomore year in high-school I played on a football team that ranked 3rd in the entire state in defense. I was the third inside linebacker (of two) so I got to rotate with the starters. I averaged playing about half the game on defense. Due to such a stout defense I had the opportunity to blitz quite often. That year as a part-time defensive player I had five sacks, two blocked punts, and a fumble recovery. I loved being a contributor to a winning team. The most exhilarating part of playing on this team was that we won over half of our games in the fourth quarter. We were almost always down by half-time but we had this confidence and expectance that we were going to win the game, and we almost always did. We finished that year 8-2.

 

Fast forward to my senior year in high-school. The record from my sophomore year was reversed. Instead of 8-2 we went 2-8. While leading the team in tackles I was unable to make as many "splash" plays because I was relied upon to be the last line of defense to secure the tackle. Our next to last game we lost by a score of 49-0. The team we played against even put in their second team players and even the second teamers scored on us. What I remember most though was how our team handled the loss afterwards. The locker room was casual and relaxed. The players went into the game expecting defeat and were ok with not giving their best. It was demoralizing to play on this team.

 

I have recently finished and read the book, "The Wisdom of Teams", by Katzenbach and Smith. This book helped me to actualize and understand why my sophomore football team was so great and my senior football team was so lousy.

 

High performance teams focus on performance, have mutual accountability, take initiatives, and know how to have fun. High performance teams do not settle for anything less than their best and are equally committed to each other's personal and individual growth.

 

High performance teams understand that they are creating a movement that is "bigger than themselves." These teams not only believe that the results will happen, they expect them to happen!

 

In being a part of teams and in leading teams I love the thrill of "taking an ordinary group of people and in doing something extraordinary." What teams are you a part of? Are you focused on performance/mission?

 

I'd rather be a complimentary part to a winning team than the leader of a losing team! There is something about winning together!

 



 

Why you should WISH March to be COLD and SNOWY

Let's be honest, it's been a brutal winter. We have set records for snow and for cold.

I am deciding to "heat" things up (pun intended) and try to explain to you why we should wish for the month of March to be just as cold and snowy as the rest of this winter. I know, it's a long shot.

Top Ten Reasons Why You Should Wish March To Be as Cold and Snowy as the Rest of the Winter:

1. Teaches us to accept what the Lord gives us when we ask! (Remember a summer or so ago when it was hot and dry and everyone was praying for precipitation and cooler temperatures. We got it!)
2. Patience needs to be learned not told!
3. Quiets any Al Gore global warming supporters.
4. Gives me an excuse to cuddle more with my wife. (If I needed any help! :)
5. Snow is beautiful and is a great reminder of the cleansing power of Jesus!
6. For the first time in awhile students actually want to go to school. They have more will power to brave the elements to finish the school year strong.
7. The Bible says "to do everything without complaining and arguing." God is giving us practice!
8.  Snow looks a lot like Sown. A good winter helps farmers in the spring, ask any farmer. You can't have sown without snow!
9. Winter brings out manly competition and motivation to prove one's valor (i.e. No Shave Months, Snowmobiling, Four Wheel Drive in order to get to church, etc.)
10. In the end we got to take what we get.......it's easier when you enjoy it!

I know I am going to hear a lot of blow back from this post by people stating how advantageous spring would be. Believe me I know that warmer weather, fishing, shorts and T-shirts, and baseball is around the corner. My point is, enjoy every moment and season of life no matter how long and harsh it may be! Take time to thank God instead of constantly looking forward to what's ahead that you forget to enjoy the blessings that God has bestowed on the here and now.

Want to be RELEVANT........watch TEENAGERS!

My wife and I went to a Fort Wayne Komets game last night. It is one of her favorite date activities. Our seats were right behind a large row of teenagers.

While most people would probably be perturbed and frustrated that by chance they had to sit behind a raucous group of teenagers, I was not. Whether these students knew it or not I was going to enjoy watching and evaluating their behavior.

Kim and I enjoyed dissecting their behavior and interpreting what type of clique or family background we would place each student. You can learn a lot from a person by sitting right behind them!

One of the greatest advantages of working with teenagers is that you are on the cutting edge of culture and relevancy. Most advertisements are geared toward reaching a younger audience. What teenagers are doing today their parents will be doing tomorrow. For example, Facebook was the rage in college circles when I was in college. As soon as parents started using Facebook younger people went to other social media outlets such as Twitter. Now I am finding that Twitter is starting to be infiltrated by the older generation as I am watching teenagers gravitate toward Instagram and Snapchat.

Instagram and Snapchat is the perfect app for teenagers. In a snapshot and visual world teenagers can communicate by sending pictures back and forth. If you want to learn about the newest social media trends, clothing styles, and music all you have to do is watch a group of teenagers.

Here's my point: Teenager's don't care if you understand and dress in the same style as they do. They prefer you to be authenticate and genuine. What is important is that you are not "out of touch" in understanding the fragmented world in which they live. To reach people you must understand their world!

This is one of the biggest reasons I visit local schools. It keeps me fresh and relevant. This past Wednesday I was unable to visit Goshen High-School and I heard about it from many teenagers at youth group that night. I have promised myself that regardless of age I will always watch, talk to, and interact with teenagers. It will keep my preaching and teaching relevant and understandable.

Let me encourage you when you go to a sporting event, movie, or other event that has teenagers to watch and take notes on a group of teenagers that you are sitting by. You may learn more then you thought! I'd love to hear what you noticed.