The REAL Jesus - Homeless Sunday!

Our church is in the middle of a sermon series entitled: "Unseen". The point of this series is that we need to be aware and help people who are unseen in that they feel alone, depressed, and isolated.

To drive this point home this past Sunday I had a friend of mine (who was unknown by the people of our church) dress up as a homeless person and sit in front of our church's doors before our Sunday morning service.

After the service my goal was to bring him up in front of our church and to ask him questions seeing if our people did a good job of reaching out to an unseen individual. My prayer for Legacy Church is that we'd always be a church where ANYONE can come to learn and grow in their walk with Jesus.

Here were the results from our experiment on Sunday...………..

Our people did a great job in noticing and reaching out to my 'homeless' friend!
- He received around $50 from various individuals (both young and old) who offered to buy him a warm meal.
- One of our greeters sat with him for approximately a half an hour trying to minister to him and get him to join our church service.
- Overall, our people were warm and were encouraging to him as they arrived. My friend was expecting people to be skeptical or even negative about his presence but he was blown away by the friendliness and compassion of our church.

This past Sunday I can say that I was proud to be the pastor of Legacy Church! May this be a good visual reminder that true faith in Jesus is all about action and responding to the opportunities that He puts in our path!

"Then the King will say to those on his right, 'Come, you who are blessed by my Father, inherit the Kingdom prepared for you from the creation of the world. For I was hungry, and you fed me. I was thirsty, and you gave me a drink. I was a stranger, and you invited me into your home. I was naked, and you gave me clothing. I was sick, and you cared for me. I was in prison, and you visited me.'" (Matthew 25:34-36)

Why you struggle with ANGER (and don't even realize it!)

We live in a world full of angry people. Be honest, what's your first reaction when one of the following happens to you?

- You don't get your fast food order on time? 
- You get cut off in traffic? 
- Someone questions something you said? 

The danger about anger is that many times we don't know we are angry. We use terms that we are just "frustrated". Frustration has it's roots in anger. When you are frustrated you are angry because of expectations that went unmet. 

Over the past couple of months I realized how angry of a person I truly was. I was not someone who would "rage" or throw "tantrums." Instead, I would let things simmer and fester inside. This can be extremely dangerous and for awhile I was completely blindsided by it.

Here are some things that I am doing (and I'd encourage you to do) to help you with anger

1) Lower Your Standards. This sounds counterintuitive or wrong. My anger was stemming from expectations that I put onto other people. When they failed or did something that was not up to par I became angry. Unfortunately, my standards were so high that I did not leave room for failure. I did not leave room for people to be human and to make mistakes. In fact, I could not even keep the standards at times that I held other people too. This does not mean that you don't hold those you do life with to standards or hold them accountable. What it does mean is that your standards are realistic and that you leave room for grace. 

2) Focus on the positive. There will always be something that is going wrong in your life. Don't focus on the negative. Many times we have so much to be thankful for as humans YET we tend to narrow in on the negative. Take time to count the positives in your life and thank God for them too!

3) Keep your anger in check. The only way to keep your anger in check is through God's Word, prayer, and proper accountability. Anger in your life can rise to levels that go undetected yet can be devastating to your emotional health. The only way to temper anger in your life is through God's power. You can't do it on your own.

Ephesians 4:26-27 - "And don't sin by letting anger control you. Don't let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a foothold to the devil."

How to Help Someone Who is Grieving This Holiday Season!

The holiday season can be a difficult time for many people because it forces us to think back on the past year and on the loss that has happened. When we encounter someone who is grieving many times we encounter an awkward feeling of not knowing what to say or to do. Here are some things to do AND to not do when you are helping someone who is grieving.

1. Be present! Be physically close to the person that is grieving. Maybe the greatest gift you can give someone this Christmas season is your presence! There is something powerful about a person's presence. Your presence literally changes the atmospheric dynamic in a room. The very presence of Jesus will help in hard times. Joy is not the absence of suffering but it is the very presence of God. When you are present with someone who is hurting you are literally being Jesus in the flesh with that person.

Proverbs 18:24 - "A real friend sticks closer than a brother."

2. Feel their pain! You can't fake caring for someone. A person will know that you care by how you emotionally and mentally feel for them. This helps them knowing that you are carrying their pains and burdens as well. Jesus wept over the death of Lazarus because he cared. Our God is a God who cares and feels our pain. We need to let other people know that we care and feel their loss as well.

Romans 12:15 - "Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep."

3. Point others to Jesus with your words! During the darkest and worst times in my life the words of Scripture and Jesus have given me hope. Texting someone a particular verse or passage of Scripture can help them. One of the best things to say to someone is simply: I'm so sorry. This conveys your heartfelt hurt.

On the contrary, do NOT say things that minimize a person's loss. While you are trying to comfort them you are better off not saying anything than something like this:

"You'll get over this."
"You'd be surprised at how often this type of things happens."
"You have other family members or kids to be thankful for." 
"I know what you are going through."

Never minimize a person's loss or share cliché churchy sayings. This hurts more than it helps. The only and true answer is Jesus. Point people to Him foremost, but do so in a proper and loving manner. Allow people to grieve and to search for the answers found in Jesus on their own.

Counting God's Blessings During the Midst of Our Miscarriage!

In the history of our universe God has used EVERTHING for His good! When there is tragedy God is there. Where there is pain God is working through it. There has never been a time in my life when my God has left me. 

Connor Joseph Cosentino was born prematurely on November 19th, 2018. He was 16 weeks old. My wife went into labor on Saturday Night and her water broke on Sunday morning. A child's lungs are unable to develop without the water sac. Either my wife had an infection or something was just not right within her body. With no chance of development and survival Connor was born. 

My wife and I made a list and counted our blessings through the midst of this tragedy. We wanted to make sure that we remembered God for the good and blessings given to our family and NOT just for the ways in which we wished things had turned out. 

Here are the blessings God bestowed upon us during the process of our miscarriage!

1. God gave us Christian doctors and nurses! The doctor that my wife originally wanted as our OBGYN was the on call hospital doctor when we arrived. When it was inevitable that Connor was going to be delivered she prayed a powerful and heartfelt prayer over us. We had many nurses pray for us and ask if they could share our situation with others to gather more prayer. 

2. The body of Christ flexed it's muscles in support! My wife and I could not have more support from the body of Christ. We were flooded with text messages, phone calls, FB messages, cards, people wanting to walk with us in our pain, etc. Not only did our local church family step up to the plate but we are receiving care and support from people many miles away too!

3. I love my wife more than I ever have! Kim was brave and heroic. When I was a blubbering mess she was stable and supportive and vice a versa. This situation could have driven us further away or closer together. Through God's help we are more united and closer together then we have ever been. 

4. Connor was a boy! My wife and I thought that Connor was going to be a girl for many different reasons. The fact that Connor was a boy, in a way, was God speaking through my insecurities as a man. I have a desire to teach Biblical manhood to other younger men. This was a reaffirmation in my mind that God sees me as a capable father of a boy. 

5. Connor passed away before he was born! There was a chance that Connor would be born alive and that I would see him "move" outside the womb before passing. God was gracious to Kim & I that Connor passed away beforehand. 

6. Connor was born the day before Charis' birthday! Our hope was that Connor would arrive before Charis' birthday as we wanted to remember both events individually and not on the same day. Connor arrived approximately two hours before our daughter's birthday. 

7. Charis' birthday party! On Tuesday evening Kim and I had a small and intimate impromptu birthday party for Charis as we wanted to celebrate her and not sit in a lonely home. Charis received more presents than she will even get for Christmas and the support from friends and family was on full display. 

8. Fast Labor and no D&C surgery required! God was good in that Kim did not have a long labor and that no further surgery was required. 

9. Charis was in good hands! After church my wife and I rushed to the hospital. Friends in town watched Charis and Kim's family was also able to step up to the plate. We never had to worry about our daughter. Both our biological and church family greatly supported us in helping with Charis!

10. We received significant gifts/mementos! The hospital and many others gave gifts and significant things in which we will forever remember and praise God for our child throughout the years!

11. God's Word stuck with me like never before! Verses flooded my soul and provided strength and nourishment. My story was much like David's in that during the process there was extreme pain, confusion, and despair. Afterwards there was total and complete peace. I echo his words with the hope that I will one day see and talk with my son. 

2 Samuel 12:23 - "Why should I fast when he is dead? Can I bring him back again? I will go to him one day, but cannot return to me."

12. Glimpses into the future! God has used every tragedy and painful experience in my life for His good and for my betterment. I had a number of good conversations while in the hospital and my God is up to something good for the Cosentino family!

13. Got to watch the best NFL regular season game in the history of the NFL! The Monday Night game with the Chiefs & Rams is being hailed as the best regular season game ever. When I was in the hospital as a child I watched the last Pittsburgh Pirate no hitter. Whenever a Cosentino is in the hospital turn on ESPN because something incredible is going to happen. 

14. We love Charis more than ever before! When you lose something it makes you more appreciative of what you do have. We are thankful for Charis' energetic personality and zest for life!

15. We have ONE MORE thing to look forward to in heaven! Heaven is going to be incredible.....Eternal bliss with Jesus. It's not like I needed one more thing to look forward to in heaven BUT now I do....to meet my son. This takes some weight off of Kim & I's shoulders too. Connor is with Jesus. He won't have to suffer or struggle in this world and one day we will get to meet and be with him forever!

How To Survive the "Daily Grind!"

Life is a grind. There are constant struggles and battles. For many of us, there is no end in sight. "Giving up" regularly comes up in our thoughts and minds. We wish we could just escape from life and from others.

You just feel tired and down. The things that used to cheer you up don't (or at least not as much as they used too). Something drastically needs to change. If you feel this way then this post is for YOU.

How to survive the "Daily Grind!"

1. Embrace the Grind. This may run contrary to what you suspected. Yet, it's the other side of the coin that so few of us take time to think about. Everyone thinks of the "daily grind" as to how it is impacting us: tiredness, lack of joy, frustration, etc. Yet, the reason why you should persevere through the "daily grind" is to make the lives of those around you better. The fact that you are creating a better life for your family or to achieve your God sized dreams should make you want to embrace the "daily grind." The biggest lie is that what you are doing now won't be worth it in the end. Yet, if you push on you will be rewarded for your hard work. So when you are tired of the grind just think about WHY you are doing it. It's not just for you but for your family and for your legacy.

Lamentations 3:27 - "It is good for a man to bear the yoke while he is young." God is allowing the "daily grind" to refine us. Embrace this part of life and push on!

2. Healthy Balance. Once the "daily grind" takes over we give up the things we need the most first (sleep, good nutrition, exercise, margin in our lives, time with God, etc.) The best way to survive the grind is to come up with a list of non-negotiables that need to get done that day. If all you have time for are the top things in your list then it's still a successful day. In the end, you will go farther, be healthier, and do more in your life because you prioritized what is important.

3. Great Friends/Support System. It's a scientific truth that you are the average of your five closest friends. If your friend's lives are out of balance then yours most likely is too. If you show me your friends then I'll show you your future. Friends impact our decisions to survive the "daily grind" more than anybody else does. Want to live a more effective and more balanced life then maybe you need different friends who will actually help you thrive and not just survive through the "daily grind!"

Anything else that you would add to this list (other than coffee :)

The Most 'Forceful' Relationship in YOUR Life....and Why it Matters!

The most forceful relationship you will have in your life is with your father. Don't get me wrong, you will have other relationships in your life that will influence you. Your relationship with your mother, wife, children, and closest friends will all mold and shape you. I chose the word forceful with carefulness because it connotes just how deeply God grafts and shapes us through our relationship with our father. Every person has to come to grips and is forced to reflect on how their father has impacted them during their life.

Did you know that the word "father" is mentioned more than 1,100 times in the Bible. God has created father's to play a prominent role in our lives. Yet, 1 out of 3 children live in fatherless homes. To see how this is impacting our world and the next generation this article from the Art of Manliness will shed more light.....Article: The influence fathers and fatherlessness has on children.

Regardless of whether you had a good father or a bad father. Whether your father was present or absent. Whether he had many strengths or many weaknesses. (By the way, every person has at least some weaknesses). Our relationship with our father shapes and molds us as people in very deep, pronounced, and forceful ways.

Here is why we are forced to think through our relationship with our father 

1) How we view our father deeply impacts how we view the Father! Your relationship with your dad will force you to think and surmise what your relationship with your Father is like. Why are many people so mad at God? Because they are mad at their father and parents. We can't get past the analogy that God is our Father. When we think of God as our father the next logical step is for us to think through our relationship with our earthly father.

2) A father's primary job deals with leadership. The greatest leadership lessons we will learn are from our fathers EVEN if we learn what not to do. God created fathers with the express purpose of teaching us leadership. 

3) A father's role is unique. You will only have one biological father. You might have multiple children. You might get divorced and remarried and have multiple spouses in your lifetime. Even if you have a stepfather when you say the word "Daddy" it generally refers to the person who you look to as father the most.

We as people are forced to think through the dynamics of our relationship with our father. If done in a healthy way it will lead to forgiveness and gratitude. If done the wrong way it can lead to bitterness, anger, and resentment. The choice is yours.

Want Your Church to Grow? Emphasize Kids Ministry! Here's Why........

During our Youth Sunday I had the opportunity to help serve within our children's ministry. This was a rare treat for me as I typically preach on Sunday's. One of the reasons why I am excited about Legacy Church is that one of our values is that we send our best leaders to develop our youth! Much of our growth as a church has happened because of our emphasis in reaching and helping families.

Here is why YOUR church should emphasize children's ministry

1) "I know you care for me if you care for my kids!" The best way to show that you care for parents is to develop the best children's ministry that you can. As a parent I will do anything to ensure that my child gets what is best. If a parent's children are safe, growing in their walk and understanding of Jesus, and are having fun, then what more would a parent want! If you focus on reaching older generations then you will reach older generations. If you focus on reaching younger generations you will reach both younger and older generations. 

2) Your town demographics are younger than you realize! Unless you live in a retirement community in Florida my guess is that you'd be surprised at how young your town/city/area truly is. You can simply find age demographics of where you live on the internet. If you want to be relevant within your town then you need to think like the people in your town think.

3) Jesus cares for kids! If Jesus prioritized time with children then we should too. In fact, Jesus stated it bluntly when he said "that the kingdom of heaven belongs to these (children)!" There is awe and wonderment at discovering who Jesus is as a child. Working with children will help us as adults remember and rediscover that excitement for Jesus!

4) Your best ideas will come from those who are younger! What the younger generation lacks in wisdom they make up for with creativity and ingenuity. There are forms and different ways to do church that have not been thought of yet, but they will be by this next generation. You should always think of including younger people when brainstorming ideas that deal with the future of your church!

5) It's an investment for the future that pays big dividends! Children's ministry helps a church right now but it will also pay HUGE dividends years down the road. The children at your church will always have a heart for your ministry because it was were they learned and grew in their walk with Jesus. A church's best hires almost always come from within the church! Who knows you might be developing and grooming the next children's volunteer or pastor for your church!

We have a great children's volunteer team!

These two students won bookbags at our Back to School Kick Off!

Child Dedications are very special. This was our 4th child born in as many months! #LegacyBoom